I could discuss how Beauty and the Geek has been deservedly canceled. I could talk about how much I love How I Met Your Mother despite how stunt casting kinda ruins the episode. Or how hilarious Shelton was in the electronics store. I could even discuss how my heart warms every time I see Chloe and Andrea in the same frame on Samantha Who?. But there were so many problems with my favorite guilty pleasure/whipping boy show, One Tree Hill, this post is dedicated to rant.
Oh where to even start?
1. BPP! Hello random music concert series sponsored by sugary food product. Just like last year. Or the year before. I’m starting to believe the TV Wheel o’Cliche’s has a dart board attachment to figure out which blatant product placements and social causes will be hurled conspicuously all over the screen.
2. JAMIE. Haley shouldn’t have lied. Or done such or poor job of covering her evidence up. But no child should ever get away with scolding their parent, especially at age 5. Your grandfather is a sociopath murderer who lies, manipulates and steals to accomplish whatever sick agenda he has at the moment. That’s why you can’t give him a thank you card, Jamie.
3. Fake baby! Oh wow, the prop dept really dropped the ball. I know the budget on OTH doesn’t cover CG, but a grip couldn’t have stood off camera and wiggled the plastic children’s toy posing as a baby? And since it was clearly that bad, why the need to close up on the doll more than once? Shoot, you could’ve just thrown a package of starbursts next to the kid’s face to distract the audience or something.
4. Lucas Scott, the worst coach ever. Forget that Q should’ve been banned from the gym over a month ago. What coach answers his cell phone during half time to take a personal call? High school half times aren’t even that long. And no self respecting coach would’ve taken a call that he knew would’ve affected his focus. Oh, sure, blah blah that was the point for his psycho freak out. Whatever. I’m over adult Lucas. Kid Lucas was surprisingly more mature.
5. I know I’ve been begging for Skillz to have a woman, but Deb? Oy.
6. Hot Dr. Copeland and no pay off for Brooke? This is the moment OTH chooses not to cash in on a certified plot device?
7. Which leaves us Peyton and Lucas. BOO promo department for your FAKEY mcFake promo last week. You do not promise Peyton/Lucas shippers some hope only to leave it with a drunken ‘I hate you’. Where is Jake? October Road just got cancelled, go get him. Jake makes the Peyton world better. Jake also wakes Lucas up out of his stupid slumber.