Good News: Gilmore Greatness can it be? The pace, the pop culture references? The awkward Emily/Lorelai/Mia interactions? Why, it almost looked like an episode out of Season 1. You know, if Logan and Rory hadn’t morphed into their annoying Season 5 selves.
Real News: Comic book hero Captain America dies
Fake News/Why I should work for The Onion:
Capt. America dead, brokenhearted over lousy AI Season
BALTIMORE- Our Marveled stars and striped superhero, Captain America, who took on Hitler years before FDR, died on Wednesday, at the young age of 66. A spokesperson from Johns Hopkins Hospital said America died from a broken heart over this year’s sub par season of American Idol.
“Mr. America closed his eyes to wait for Sanjaya’s song to pass and never opened them again,” a nurse said. The end was seen coming last year when Captain America suffered a debilitating stroke in the wake of Chris Daughtry’s shocking send off.
After a reality free summer and Daughtry’s platinum album, Captain America felt well enough to give Lois Lane his final interview. “America’s youth has many challenges to face and they are sorely under educated when it comes to fighting fascism, energy conservation and song selection.”